It is check-in time for One Word pursuits and I couldn't think where I have Bloomed lately. As we work to respond to being Called out of Phoenix and back down the road I find myself trying to find 'center'. The whole 'ducks in a row' thing comes to mind and some days the 'enemy' throws those darts of discouragement. Last week, as you all know, was particularly hard. But.
Yes, but... then I realize, maybe it is this whole bloomy process God has me walking, the habits He is transforming in me, the reactions He is trimming... they ARE making a difference and I see it in times like last week when I dropped into a depressive cycle; it was different. In the darkness of my hopelessness.... I still had hope. In the aching of my loneliness, I was comforted under the hem of His Great robe. And through it all, my husband, he was marked by a different attitude too. The ripple affect of a bloomy attitude? Perhaps. His grace and love were greater than ever before and my recovery from those dark corners came without the deep heartache it always had before.
SOMETHING has changed. And if I can sit here, the 27th of March, and notice the subtle differences after only 3 months of my one-word, Blooming... I rejoice to think what 9 more months will reveal!
So I go back to my plumb line and I mark...
√ Motherhood is magnificent, don't miss a moment if you can help it.... and I sit and and I deep-heart listen. I look in their eyes, I laugh with their fun, I cry with their hurts, and I am firm when I need to be because I love them... and I celebrate a day marked by the blooming effects of this mission in the heart.
√ I turn to my husband, I smile when I want to frown. I laugh when I want to cry. I am quiet when I want to speak words that could turn things upside down. I am far from perfect at this, but his growing-gentler-heart tells me my efforts in blooming are already producing lovely blossoms.
√ I look to the Lord, I crawl under the hem of His robe when I am scared, I reach out and feel his heartbeat when I need to know LIFE and I touch the holes in His hands when I need to realize the purpose of Death. I am victorious only because He was victorious first... the darkness isn't as dark.... the light is so much brighter... the King is so much closer and I will not stop my pursuit because I know he can just never be 'close enough'!
√ Expression, appropriately but deeply is blooming too. The words I have opened my heart to allow God to pour through me... in my journal, on this blog and to others, have never been so rich. I see Him SPEAK to me through those moments and then I am so blessed to see Him speak to others and I find that me-and-thee-and-WE are suddenly ONE. One sisterhood walking the path of hope with Jesus by our side, so many bloomy thoughts in one beautiful moment and I.want.MORE!!!
And on-and-on-and-on. I am not there yet... and even when a year has poured into those final seconds breaching over into a new one, I suspect blooming will become a life-long process, only, every petal will then (my hope is) be in place!
In the final moments of my messy week last week, I was invited to a Beth Moore conference. I got to see her animated figure walking around on the stage in the middle of the arena at Grand Canyon University here in Phoenix. I don't follow alot of Beth Moore studies or events, but I believe this invite was a divine appointment. She said something that marked me. Based on this:
From now on, let no one make trouble for me; for I carry the marks of Jesus branded on my body.
- Galatians 6:17
We are all marked by either wounds or scars. Some more than others. We all have them. But when we trust Jesus with 'wound care' he goes in and writes his name inside each one so that we are no longer scarred.... we are marked.
I have been so marked on this journey since we left Montana in August. And now, this Blooming process began in January has taken those marks even further and every day I step onto this transforming path God has called me to walk in order to do more than just grow has been marked by Him as well. It is hard to list out moments of bloominess because the name of Jesus is spreading and seeping into EVERY every part of who God is blooming me to become. And my hope has not failed as a result.
This song is stuck in my head today... part of the blooming... it strengthens me to think of the GOD of ANGEL ARMIES is always by my side!!!
I pray you have ONE WORD God is growing and blooming you through this year. Even if you don't write about it on a blog, you can still search Him to live it day-by-day to see more of Him in more of you.
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